It isn’t easy to maintain self motivation 365 days a year. We are all human and this means we have human experiences that can easily interfere with the self starter we all have within us. The winter has finally arrived and this can have a major impact on many of us. Duvet days beckon, but we need to listen to the alarm clock, it is telling us it is time to get up and seize the day.

If you are suffering from the dreaded procrastination bug, then there is only one thing you can do to overcome this affliction and that is to call up the self motivator in yourself and what ever it is you are putting off until tomorrow ‘just do it‘ today, in fact, why not ‘just do it’ NOW!

The Procrastinator

Imagine every day as you leave the house, the walls leading toward the front door need painting. Every day you leave the house saying to yourself  ”these walls need painting, I must get round to it”. However, every day you walk past the walls and continue to tell yourself you need to paint the walls on exit and entry to the house.

Imagine then you go to the nearest DIY store and select the colour and purchase the pot of paint.  You then return home and put the pot of paint down by the walls that need painting and say to yourself  ”I will paint the walls tomorrow”.  You feel fairly satisfied that you have at least purchased the pot of paint.  However, the following day you leave the house, walking past the pot of paint and repeat the mantra ” I must paint these walls”.  The days continue with the following mantra!  So you now have choices. You can either paint the walls or sell the pot of paint!!

The Self Motivator

Leaves the house that morning saying ” These walls need painting” Proceeds to the nearest DIY shop the same day. Comes home. Paints the walls.  The next day, leaves the house looking at the walls saying to themselves ” that looks so much better” and feels very pleased with themselves and the sense of achievement helps them have a better day as they leave the house and very welcoming as they arrive home!

This scenario fits every task, be it at home or at work.

Set yourself goals, remain focussed, visualise the outcome and just do it..simple but very effective!

Joy Andrews Business Coaching

I believe that Stress could be the next epidemic this country will face, if it isn’t already! Stress is known as the silent killer, it can creep up at any time and cause no end of physical and emotional health problems, costing business’ billions and people their lives.

Are you suffering from Stress?

Here are some symptoms of Stress. If you tick more than one of the symptoms, then you are indeed suffering from Stress, which, if left untreated, could lead to major physical health implications.

• Anger
• Depression
• Anxiety
• Changes in behaviour
• Food cravings
• Lack of appetite
• Frequent crying
• Difficulty concentrating
• Feeling tired
• Difficulty sleeping

What are common Stress Triggers?

• A general increase in the pace and complexity of working life brought about by the rapid growth in information technology
• The erosion of personal space and time resulting from developments in communications technology
• Increased workloads resulting from staff cutbacks, etc
• Increasingly informed and demanding customers and clients
• Lack of job security
• The stresses involved in commuting to and from work, travelling on the job etc.

Where there is recession, there is stress. Business’ downsize on human resources, but there expectations on the existing staff performances increase. Redundancies, unemployment, low income, there are many triggers for a Stress Attack, but behind every trigger there is Change of some sort and where there is Change there is Loss!

How do you manage your Stress?

From my many years experience firstly as a Therapist and now as a Coach, I have assisted many people in Stress Management Techniques. However, in order to manage your stress, you need to first recognise and then accept that Stress is affecting you and your loved ones.

Self Awareness is the key to a healthier and happier lifestyle.

Here are a few Stress Relief Techniques

• Exercise – no surprises there – simply walk for at least 30 minutes every day.
• Breathing from the Diaphragm – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4hIKv2dsPC8&feature=related
• Take daily lunch breaks away from your workstations
• Spend time with friends
• Listen to Music regularly and Dance
• Have FUN, watch Comedy Films, Laugh out Loud!
• Stop watching the news and reading the papers – they are full of doom and gloom!!

I am a great advocate for fun and laughter, laughter is most definitely the best medicine.  Unfortunately, I actually witnessed Management in high pressure Corporate working environments, informing employee’s not to laugh so much!  Can you actually believe that!?  We all know the financial impact Stress can have on business’ – Stress costs business’ billions every year in the UK alone.

Poor Stress Management Techniques

Alcohol consumption/dependency is on the increase and binge drinking is becoming a national health issue.  Binge drinking is not only a teenage health risk, it is a health risk for all ages and alcohol dependency is becoming an issue for every age group!

I am left with no doubt, that we as a nation are taking life far too seriously and I mean that seriously!

Is it time for you and your business to do a Stress Audit?

http://joyandrewsbusinesscoaching.co.uk/

As a Business and Personal Development Coach, I consider time to be the most valuable commodity man has at his disposal.  You can bank money, but you can’t bank time, so you need to be careful how you spend it!

Effective communication, is an essential requirement in the business world, so we need to be certain we get it right.  As a Development Coach, it is essential for me to be an effective communicator, as you buy my time, so getting direct to the point is my style! Some see it as refreshing, as they are more often than not surrounded by ‘Yes’ people and others find it a challenge to begin with, as they are not used to someone being so direct with them.

You can call me the ‘Simon Cowell equivalent of Coaches’, but this needs to be my approach, as my time is precious too and I need to be careful how I spend it!

I reflect back what I hear and see. I am considered to be a compassionate person by all that know me well, therefore, my honest communication is considered my strongest asset and will become yours too, if that is what you wish to accomplish. I must warn you, the requirement is to have a thick skin, as being authentic and true to yourself, requires not seeking others approval and an abundance of Self Belief.

Development = Change

Our business time is valuable and work/life balance in todays society is becoming more and more compromised. Stress is a killer, so we must all learn how to manage ourselves and our time, in order to overcome the biggest threat to people and to business’ during this current economic climate.  Sickness levels are on the increase due to stress. Business’ are losing thousands of pounds productivity every second due to sickness or the so called ‘duvet days’. Stress creates a symptom like that of a can of fizzy drink; if you shake the can consistently, we all know what happens when we pull the tab!!

Time is Money

I do not wish to waste my time or any others by ‘tip toe-in’  around any important communication deficiency I detect. Time management teaches us to prioritise and that includes our communication, as communication is the key to any successful relationship.

So now I have introduced my style to your business people out there, let us get straight to the point and here is my first question to you….

• How do you communicate to others in order to build and sustain relationships?

Communication Skills

Perhaps until now, you may have never reflected upon your style of communication. As you are aware, effective communication is the key to any relationship, be it with colleagues, business partners or more importantly, the customer.

Communication is a skill, which means it is something you have learn’t and therefore, you have role modeled from your early years, namely your parents. We may all wear our business hats, however, our style of relating to others has become a habit, therefore, if you have an ineffective communication style, this may have a major impact on the success of your business and career.

You would of undoubtedly heard of the ‘Dr’s bedside manner’ cliche, or lack of them in some cases, well this is a prime example of how we communicate to others, both verbal or non verbal, affects our Customer Relations.

The Solutions to Effective Communication

Listening skills are something that we all at one time or another, need to improve.

• How often do your feel listened too?
• How often do you actively listen to others, without interruption, interpretation or making assumptions?
• Do you question others communication, if you do not understand?

Listening Skills Exercise

Allow someone to speak to you, without saying a word. Simply listen to them without judgement, for as long as it takes for them to speak and then reflect back to them all that you heard and understood for clarification purposes.

I have asked many clients to undergo this exercise with another, taking it in turns to allow each other to speak for two minutes and the other to listen and reflect back verbatim what they heard. The feedback from them was as follows:-

The Listener

• How difficult they found it to listen and not to interrupt or respond, or make interpretations or assumptions.

Essentially, you have to just listen, therefore, you can not think because you are listening hard in order to reflect back verbatim.

The Speaker

• How difficult they found it just speaking for two minutes, as they were not used to being totally listened to.
• How empowered they felt after the verbatim reflection, having been listened too and understood.

The Freedom of Speech

The freedom to express ourselves, is something we are given as a human right and the right to be heard is a profound development tool. Customers need to be heard, we all need to be heard and understood, it is essential that we hear the needs of others, more importantly, the Customer.

We as human beings need to communicate, as it is essential for our wellbeing. Stress is more often than not, a direct cause of miscommunication or not being heard and understood, along with the inability to communicate effectively with Confidence.  We have evolved into communicators, we no longer beat our chests or grunt!

Communication Coaching

As a Coach, it is important for me to empower people, which is something I am extremely passionate about. Communication is empowering and as we are the only species that use words, we need to ensure we use this privilege wisely. I believe we need to select our words with due care and consideration for others, in order to build and sustain effective business and personal relationships.

Change

For those of you who have followed my blogs, you will recognise how much emphasis I place on Change. Change is inevitable; my metaphor for change is ‘like a worn out pair of ‘old faithful’ comfortable slippers you are reluctant to throw away, its time to go buy yourself a new pair, when they start falling apart and smelling!

Comfort Zones

We all have communication comfort zones, which we believe are comfortable, but if you actually take time to reflect, you will notice they are actually not comfortable at all. More often than not, they are actually a hinderance that is preventing you from developing your business from becoming  one of the most successful business’ in your skill set.

Let us not forget – its good to talk but more importantly, it is just as important to listen to the needs of others, namely the Customer!

http://joyandrewsbusinesscoaching.co.uk/

As a  Business and Personal Development Coach, I consider Time to be the most valuable commodity man has at his disposal. You can bank money, but you can’t bank time! So my communication style is by getting directly to the point, to save time. Some see it as refreshing, as they may be surrounded by ‘yes’ people and others find it a challenge to begin with, as they are not so used to someone being so direct with them.

As a Coach, I reflect back what I hear and see. I am considered to be a compassionate and considerate person by all that know me well, therefore, my honest and immediate communication is considered my strongest asset and will become yours too, if that is what you wish to accomplish.

Time is Money

Our business time is valuable and your work/life balance in today’s society is becoming more and more compromised. Stress is a killer, so we must all learn how to manage ourselves and our time, in order to overcome the biggest threat to business’.

Sickness levels are on the increase due to stress. Business’ are losing thousands of pounds productivity every second due to time off sick, or the so called ‘Duvet Days’! To use a metaphor to explain the impact of stress on our emotional and physical wellbeing; compare yourself with a bottle of fizzy drink, the pressures of balancing our work and personal life is like shaking ourselves consistently and we all know what happens when you shake a bottle of fizzy drink consistently!

The Art of Effective Communication

I would not wish to waste my time or any others, by ‘dilly dallying’ around any important communication deficiency I detect. Time management teaches us to prioritise and that includes our communication, as it is the key to any successful relationship. So now I have introduced my style to you business people out there, let us get straight to the point: Here are some questions for you to reflect on…

How do you communicate to others in order for you build and sustain effective relationships?

Do you communicate with immediacy?

Do you use negative words or positive words when communicating?

Self Reflection raises Self Awareness

“Think twice before you speak, because your words and influence will plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another.” – Napoleon Hill

Perhaps, until now, you may have never reflected upon your style of communication. As you are aware, effective communication is the key to any relationship, be it in business or personal relationships.

Communication is a style that you have role modelled from your significant others in your early years – however, anything can be developed if that is your desire. We may all wear business hats when at work, however, our style of relating to others has become a habit, therefore, if you have a dysfunctional way of relating to your family at home, you may just be creating a dysfunctional family at work.

Contrary to popular belief, there are many i’s in a team.  Every member of the team is an individual working toward a common goal, however, we are all still individuals with our own unique communication styles to integrate successfully or not into team work.

“Feelings of worth can flourish only in an atmosphere where individual differences are appreciated, mistakes are tolerated, communication is open, and rules are flexible – the kind of atmosphere that is found in a nurturing family.” – Virginia Satir

You may have heard people mention their Dr’s bedside manners, or lack of them; well this is a prime example of how the way we relate and respond to others, affects our customer and working relationships. It is time to take note of how you respond to others, in order to build and sustain excellent and effective business relationships.

The Solution to Better Communication

Listening skills are something that we all, at one time or another, need to improve upon.

How often do you feel listened too?
How often do you actively listen to others without interruption?
Are you able to put yourself in the shoes of the person who is communicating to you?

Do you constantly interrupt people when they speak to you?

Take notice of how people respond to you when you communicate with them to help you improve your techniques. If your bold enough, ask them how your communication makes them feel!

“Confidence comes not from always being right but from not fearing to be wrong.” – Peter T. McIntyre

Active Listening Skills Exercise

Allow someone to speak to you without you saying a word. Simply listen to them without judgement, for as long as it takes for them to speak and then reflect back to them all that you have heard and understood to seek clarification that you heard and interpreted correctly. I have asked clients to undergo this exercise many times and the feedback from the individuals were:-
1) How difficult people found it speaking without interruption, as they are just not used to it.
2) How difficult people found it not to interrupt the speaker, as they are not used to just listening.
3) How empowered and relieved they felt, after having the ability to speak and then clarify in order to feel understood.

The Freedom of Speech

The freedom to express ourselves is something we are given as a human right and the right to be heard is also a profound development tool.  Front line to CEO, we all need to be heard and understood; it is not only essential for a successful business, it is also essential for our physical and emotional wellbeing, as we have evolved into ‘word’ communicators.

“Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.” – Anne Morrow Lindbergh

We have evolved so that we no longer need to beat our chests or grunt!  We need to communicate in order to feel heard and understood. More importantly, everything is subjective and open to interpretation, which is why reflecting back what we heard is important for clarification, especially when dealing with customers requirements and enquiries.

As a Coach, it is my duty to empower people. Empowering others to empower themselves and others, is my skill and I consider this to be a skill I wish to help others to develop and pass on. Communication is empowering and as we are the only species that use words to communicate and express ourselves, I believe we need to select our words with care, in order to build and sustain effective business and personal relationships.

Mirroring

NLP teaches us to mirror the other in order to build rapport. Mirroring others is an essential tool; however, we need to be aware that some of our clients or colleagues verbal and non verbal communication styles can not be mirrored, otherwise we are just colluding with ineffective communication styles.

Sometimes, we have to be more empathically direct and honest, in order to help others create better communication styles in order to help others feel understood and also to improve business and customer relations.

The customers pay your salary!

Solutions – Positive Communication

Reflect on your communication style…accept it may need improvement – then take action.

Use positive words and metaphors.

Smile often.

Hold your head up when solution seeking and communicating.

When you wake every morning think immediately of 10 things to be thankful for.

Think of the people who love you and have an attitude of gratitude for all that you already have.

Coaching Summary

Ask someone you trust for honest feedback on your communication style, both verbal and non-verbal – constructive feedback is always good!  It may even be time to get a Coach!

Positive words and metaphors along with smiling, will automatically change your style of communicating with others.

Positive thinking and solution focus will transform your communication.  Be thankful for and put a positive spin on any experience – ask yourself – What have you learn’t and how can you develop from this experience?

Spend only 10% of your time on a problem and 90% of your time on the solution to that problem. Most importantly,  laugh at yourself at any given opportunity and have as much fun as you can, whilst developing yourself and your business’!

“I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” – Michael Jordan

Control the time

Reducing the time of interruptions needs you to take control of the situation. Asking how long the person needs right at the start of the conversation will help them realize there is a time limit for unscheduled discussions. If they need longer than you can spare right now, get your diary out and make an appointment.

Summarize

Summarizing the main points helps the pace, shows the other person you understand the points and helps brings the conversation to a close. It may also help to keep the meeting brief if you can discourage the interrupter from sitting down.

Create free time

Open door times

Setting aside specific times during the day perhaps one hour in the morning and again in the afternoon when colleagues can take 5 or 10 minutes of your time. This lets people know that you are available during the day but that they need to think twice and justify an interruption ‘out of hours’.

Manage your e-mails

You can also help your time management by not having your inbox open on your computer all day. Constantly checking your e-mails can be a huge interruption to your thought process. If you have a set time in the morning then again in the afternoon to deal with your e-mails, it can less disruptive than dealing with them as they come in.

Phones

Make sure that you are not the first one in line of pick-up for telephone calls. If possible get others to field your calls and let them know when you are and are not available to take calls. This may mean they can have access to your diary or schedule to know when you are around and or available.

Remember…

It is the role of the leader of the company to spend about 80% of their time working on growing and improving the business and only 20% of their time working in the business, physically doing a job. Many business owners find that split very uncomfortable but if you are not working on growing your business and your competitors are – you will get left behind.